It’s Official: No One Watches TV on the TV Anymore

It’s a good thing TV ratings aren’t the stock market, because we would all be screwed. Like, more than we are now. This series of comparisons between today’s hits and yesteryear’s flops is pretty shocking. Did you know that the same number of people watching the premiere of New Girl (enough to get it picked up for a full season) watched Who Wants to Marry My Dad? in August of ’03? And that same number is smaller than the average audience for My So-Called Life, prompting its cancellation?

Obviously ratings are lower now across the board because of DVR and the Internet – and networks showing episodes online even before they air on TV probably won’t help bring those TV ratings up. But if everyone knows that the way we access our entertainment is different now than it was ten years ago, why, why, why are we still using the old ratings as a way to gauge who watches what? It makes no sense. And every time I think about it all the blood goes to my face and I just want to go beat up some dweeby Nielsen families. And bring a camera with me and tape it and watch it later, on my computer.

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