Splitsider

Wednesday, June 13th, 2012

Come Up With Some Fantasy 'Louie' Plotlines and Win a Season 2 Blu-ray Set

Oh, thank god, Louie is coming back in a couple of weeks for its third season. In anticipation of that, we've got two sets of season 2 Blu-rays on hand to give away. Want one of em? It's easy! Just come up with a potential plotline that you would love to see happen on season 3. We know folks such as Jerry Seinfeld and Marc Maron will be appearing, but don't let that limit your imagination. Here are a couple of examples to get you started:

-Louie takes LSD with Reggie Watts and goes for a hot air balloon ride
-Louie gets trapped in a cave and hallucinates visions of the future
-Louie gets elected to the US Senate

You know, stuff like that. So leave your brilliant ideas in the comments and we'll pick our two favorites by the end of day tomorrow to take home the loot. Have fun!

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  • Patrick Cotnoir

    Louie creates a TV show based on his life. A "Louie inside of a Louie" if you will

  • http://sorryyourheinous.tumblr.com syh

    This is the internet and Splitsider so… Louie attends a house-warming party that plays out over seven different timelines. One features Evil Louie.

  • Glenn

    Marc Maron gets a TV show called "Fuck you Louis CK".  And it's more popular than Louie.

  • http://twitter.com/Justin_Geldz Justin Geldzahler

    - Louie meets one of his most vehement critics, Larry Crank, and finds common ground. Louie admits to most of his shortcomings despite little prompting from Crank.
    - Louie's dead father visits in ghost form. Louie admits to blaming his father for most of his failings before acknowledging he does so no longer, after having become a father himself. They bond over watching and making fun of Ghost Dad.
    - Louie visits Mars and meets an alien culture. He makes an awkward joke, quickly alienating himself.

  • BonzoGal

    Louie gets hit in the head by an errant beachball at a public swimming pool and is knocked into the kiddy wading pool.  Despite a  nasty goose-egg on the noggin, he feels fine and goes home.  However, he now has the ability to read other peoples' thoughts, but only when those thoughts are about him.  He starts reacting to these hidden thoughts and all sorts of uncomfortable wackiness ensues.  He is surprised to find that people he likes think bad things about him and people he dislikes are actually pretty nice.  This causes an massive public emotional breakdown, at which point he wakes up in the kiddy pool and realizes it was all a dream.  He still can't shake the feeling that he really does know how people think of him, though.  That, and he's banned from the swim center for life.

  • Dw

    Louie is told to get a "proper job" and decides to take on a paper route.

    Louie blends all of his leftovers together and drinks it. He spends the rest of the episode on the toilet, feeling rubbish about his life.

    Louie goes speed dating.

  • Michael

    One of Louie's daughters catches him masturbating

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=692761624 Greg Saunders

    - Louie takes his daughters to the fair and ends up having sex with a carny in a port-a-potty

    - After an awful stand-up gig, Louie goes to Lenny Bruce's grave to ask for advice. Lenny (played by Chris Rock) tells him to fuck off and leave him alone.

    - Louie has the greatest first date of his life with a beautiful woman who shares his interests, has an identical worldview, loves kids, and has an amazing sense of humor. Within minutes, they both realize that they want to spend the rest of their lives together. As they walk out of the restaurant to hail a cab, she says something horribly racist. 

    - A stray bullet from a drive-by shooting grazes Louie's arm. The majority of the episode takes place in the waiting area of the emergency room as an assortment of horribly disfigured people come in one after another. 

    - Louie and Pamela finally have sex. Afterwards they get in a huge argument because he wasn't paying attention all of the times she mentioned that she has Hep C.

    - Louie gets sick of touring and decides to get a day job. His interview at a temp agency (guest star Bob Saget) goes horribly when he starts to realize he isn't qualified to do anything but stand-up. He ends up getting a job in a sweatshop.

    - Louie goes to parent/teacher conference night at his daughter's school. While waiting to speak with a teacher, he poops his pants and has to struggle to clean himself up in the tiny, child-size bathrooms. Afterwards, during the conference, the teacher says "I love you on The Office!" and insists on doing nothing but talk about the show. After trying to change the subject, he awkwardly tells a made up story about the guy who plays Stanley. 

    - Louie falls asleep on the subway and wakes up in a mysterious borough that he didn't know existed. He wanders around for a while and eventually runs into Richard Belzer, who tells him to quit comedy and settle down on a cop show or some other network bullshit.

    - Louie goes to Hawaii?!

  • Dw

    Louie earns a million dollars from selling a special online and fantasises how to spend it.

  • http://twitter.com/jdbridgman Jeremy Bridgman

    - Louie is approached about developing a late night talk show and gets a meeting with Conan for the inside scoop. Feeling threatened, Conan dissuades Louie from pursuing it, only to later take that very job.

    - Louie is evicted from his apartment, and his only option is to stay with his ex wife and her new husband.

  • http://twitter.com/CBuchholtz Cameron Buchholtz

    - Louie gets in a car accident because he was masturbating while driving. 

  • Rory

    We see that Louie's entire life has merely been a dream inside Tommy Westphall's mind.

  • Daniel O'Brien

    There's a reality dating show where regular folks are paired with famous people who will act as their "Celebrity Wingman," (feeding them pick-up lines through an earpiece or occasionally stepping in to talk up the "regular guy," like a standard wingman). Despite his protestations, Louie is booked as the Celebrity Wingman. The regular guy he's paired with is unfamiliar with him and they immediately don't get along. The honest advice Louie feeds to the guy, ("Her? You don't want to hit on her, she's 22 years old, that's exhausting, and boring, she's not old enough to have done anything interesting yet but she'll still have an inflated sense of entitlement. Go talk to the bartender. She's older. She's interesting. She's seen some shit."), is nowhere near what the (possibly sleazy) guy had in mind. When Louie actually steps in, he just makes matters worse by being nervous and awkward and sweaty and generally "Louis CK-esque."

  • dlauer2

    Louie throws an aluminum can in the trash. Some lady starts yelling at him for not recycling. They argue for a while, but then they find they share an attraction to each other. The next day, the lady and Louie go out to dinner, and things go really well. On the way out of the restaurant, a garbage truck drives by, and the can Louie threw away falls out of the back. The lady slips on it, hits her head, and goes into a coma.

  • http://bbautista.com/ bbautista

    Louis on the toilet for a half-hour, no cuts… one continuous shot. Daughters running in and out, talking to himself in the mirror, people calling him on the phone, etc.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=692761624 Greg Saunders

    - Louie gets a telephone call from Jesus. After spending a few minutes chatting about religion, Louie asks why everybody is so uptight about sex. Jesus laments that he died a virgin. Louie tells him about his first time masturbating, to Joyce DeWitt from Three's Company. The next day, he runs into some comic friends backstage at The Comedy Store who admit that it was a prank call.

    - Louie's agent begs him to do one of those "I Love the 80's" style countdown shows, despite how much Louie hates the format. After finding out that it's shot up the street from his apartment and that it pays well, he reluctantly agrees. Once he gets on set and starts shooting, he realizes that the show is "The 100 Most Brutal Rapes in History". Louie is stunned into silence while a producer keeps cajoling him to say something funny. 

    - Louie goes to the mall and is asked out on a date by an awkward girl who works at Hot Dog on a Stick. He spends the afternoon getting ready and looking forward to their date. When they meet up, she's still dressed in her uniform. They end up going to dinner at the nice restaurant anyways and she ends up choking to death on a dinner roll.

    - Louie goes shopping for a new cell phone. The clerk points out how each phone has unique features that realyl intrude on your privacy (a public map that shows where you are at all times, a built-in feature that shows how often you go to the bathroom). As he walks out the door with his new phone, there's a terrorist attack. He tries to call home, but he can't get any signal. 

    - Louie runs into Joe Piscopo at the grocery store. They have a long conversation about Frank Sinatra. Joe then insists Louie do him a favor and get him one of those TV show like deals. 

    - Louie is asked to audition for Woody Allen's next movie. He spends all day with Pamela practicing a Woody Allen impression. When he gets to the audition room, it's full of pudgy, redheaded men in their early 40's. When he finally gets to audition, he reads for the part of the best friend of the Woody Allen-ish protagonist (played by George Clooney).

  • vtao

    Louie goes to sleep and dreams that he is visited by the ghosts of his comedy heroes. They are, in order, Mike Birbiglia as Bill Hicks, Arsenio Hall as Richard Pryor and Patton Oswalt as a stockier George Carlin. Louie expects the trio to give him advice but instead they pay little attention to him as they dawdle around Louie's apartment, smoking cigarettes and watching television. Hicks goes off on a rant about how bad Louie's stand up is. Louie eventually breaks down and apologizes for disappointing his heroes. Just as a sympathetic Carlin is about to reveal to Louie the secret to comedy, Louie wakes up. He is visibly frustrated. Louie then looks under his covers to realize he had a nocturnal emission. 

  • http://mattpayton.tumblr.com MattPayton

    - Louie discovers that he fathered a child when he was 18 years old and the son is now an up-and-coming Wall Street broker who is a total sleeze but Louie thinks he's fun.

    - Louie eats the best barbecue he's ever had on the road and decides that no meal will ever top it so he starts eating healthy and turns into someone who can only talk about what they're eating all the goddamn time.

    - Louie tries to take up the trumpet again and joins an amateur jazz band that fulfills a lot of his artistic urges that haven't been met in a long time. He then quits when they pick a boring name for the band. 

  • Jessussexy

    Louie takes his daughters to the aquarium and accidentally causes it's world famous gay penguin couple to break up.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=500810121 Edwina Hay

    Louie has a bad time in general.

    Just kidding! Here are my entries though:

    -Due to the miscommunication in the second season finale, Louie impulsively flies to France to surprise Pam because he no longer wishes to wait for her.

    -Louie participates in "Bring Your Daughter To Work Day" and brings his eldest child to a comedy club to do a set but finds himself unable to be profane (or be funny) while she is sitting in the audience.

    -Louie has to explain where babies come from. To an adult.

  • http://www.facebook.com/parmahn Par Mahn

    I have a random idea that is slightly similar to the episode
    where he awkwardly meets a fan.

    Louie walks into a convenience store somewhere more
    remote/in another country with his daughters. His daughters run to the back of
    the store to look at something and Louis yells to them “hey, girls…”. The store
    clerk sees him and says “oh hey its Louis CK!” and Louis awkwardly says “oh…hey
    yeah, how’s it going…Jane put that down!”. The cashier says “hey man, you’re a
    really big influence to me and I really respect your comedy” etc, and Louis drearily
    responds “yeah thanks that’s great”. The cashier attempts small talk with Louis
    while he attempts to get through this interaction and promptly purchase his
    products. Cashier “how come you’re [in this location]?” Louis “we’re just
    passing through to [some main attraction elsewhere]”. The girls come over with
    some sweets and Louis tells them to put them back. The cashier then says “don’t
    worry its on me” and the girls rejoice to Louis` lenience. The clerk serves
    them their products and asks Louis for a picture. Louis states “I don’t do pictures”.
    After some persuasion Louis takes a pic with him and one of his girls takes the
    picture. As they’re looking at the picture and laughing at a face Louis
    accidentally pulled in it, the clerk sees a group of local thugs heading to the
    store. He tells Louis and Louis grabs his daughters. The clerk tells him to run
    to the back and to call the police. Louis runs through an open door in the back
    of the store and sits behind the door with his daughters. He listens to the
    thugs enter and some commotion occurring; after a brief silence he hears a
    gunshot and then quick scattering and the sound of cans/bottles. About a minute
    of silence later, he enters the store by himself to see the clerk dead on the
    floor with his phone in his hand. Louie picks up the phone and sees the picture
    still open. He deletes the picture and goes back to make sure his daughters don’t
    walk out and see and calls the police. FIN

  • Michelle T

    Louie reluctantly begins taking
    anti-depressant medication when his depression worsens.  Once on the
    medication he experiences a loss of libido. Instead of getting angry or upset
    at this new development, Louie embraces it since it means he doesn’t have to
    worry about sex anymore. The new laid back and anxiety free Louie attracts the
    interest of a woman he meets at his daughter’s school. Their date goes well but
    when sex is initiated, Louie is unable to achieve an erection.  Embarrassed,
    he offers to go down on her but the date still ends awkwardly and he winds up
    slouching back to the apartment in defeat.  He wonders whether you can be happier
    with prescription drugs which help simulate happiness or happier depressed but
    with the ability to fuck. He explains this dilemma to his therapist, who is
    more interested in Louie describing his date's vagina then he is about Louie's
    mental wellbeing.  The episode ends with the therapist asking Louie a
    rapid fire series of questions about his date. For example: Shaved or unshaved?
    Describe her aroma in excruciating detail. If you had to compare it to a wild
    animal, what would you compare it to?

  • http://twitter.com/connor_hurt_4 connor hurt

    Louie makes fun of the mob in one of his acts and they find out. They get him back by torturting him through making him masturbate while they watch him and laugh.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=692761624 Greg Saunders

    - Louie's high school best friend is in town to tell him he's got terminal cancer. They try to spend one last fun weekend together, but Louie realizes his friend grew up to be an asshole. As they say goodbye, Louie says "let's be honest, you kinda deserve this". 

    - Louie's daughter gets suspended from school. He cancels plans he already had so he can watch her during the day. She sees one of his stand-up specials on TV while he's in the bathroom and he has to have a long talk with her about his career. He ends up trying to explain why a joke he told about having anal sex with a nun is funny. 

    - Louie is asked to be the grand marshall at a parade in the South. It ends up being a Confederate pride theme. During the parade, he waves and smiles to the crowd while surrounded with confederate flags, but keeps making eye contact with black people in the crowd and mouthing the words "I'm so sorry". 

    - Louie finds an old love letter he wrote when he was a teenager that's addressed to a girl he dated at the time. Feeling whimsical, he drops it in the mailbox. A few days later, the husband of the now-grown woman who recieved the letter (played by John Stamos) beats the shit out of him. 

    - David Cross asks Louie to perform at "Comedy vs. the 1%" fundraiser/rally. He agrees before realizing he doesn't really have any political material. He does a few minutes of jokes about how strage dogs are that completely bomb. He then makes an offhand reference about bankers that kills. He ends the set with a long string of vicious insults directed at rich people that's greeted with gales of laughter. 

    - Louie has a new girlfriend that he takes to a coffee shop to meet Pamela. He gets a phone call and says "I'll be right back". Pamela and the new girlfriend hit it off and chat up a storm before realizing that Louie has been gone for a while. This prompts Pamela to start complaining about how unreliable Louie is and insisting that the new GF could do better. They eventually leave moments before Louie returns, completely covered in blood. 

    - Louie buys a lottery ticket every morning. The episode shows him doing this over and over through the course of his life. Finally, an elderly Louie purchases a winning lottery ticket and is promptly stabbed by a homeless man dressed like Batman. 

  • http://twitter.com/SmithLGreg Greg L. Smith

    -Louie's leaving a restaurant, when an old person in front of him deliberately closes the door in his face, rather than holding it for him. Infuriated, Louie follows him for an entire day. By nighttime, the old man notices and confronts him. Louie learns that the old man still works, despite his kids begging him to retire. "Open your own goddamn door," he says, then slams his door in Louie's face. Did Louie learn something from this?
    -Louie's older daughter is obsessed with looking "beautiful." She reads beauty magazines, watches shallow TV, and asks Louie to buy her all kinds of products. Because of an upcoming school picture, Louie relents and buys a hair straightener. One day he comes home to find his daughter "straightening" their dog's fur, who howls in pain. The rest of the episode is a mad dash to try and save the dog.
    -Louie has lunch with Jim Carrey. Louie taunts Carrey for abandoning his roots and doing shit like "Yes Man." Carrey, quite zen, tells Louie that doing stuff like that has caused to refocus and look at life more positively. Louie then decides he's going to try and say "Yes" to everything for a day – resulting in a dark trip through NYC's more unsavory parts.   

  • Anthony

    - Louie performs at a college. Afterwards, a group of frat guys come up to him and ask him to attend their party. He says that he doesn't "want to be the old guy at a college party," but ends up going when they tell him how great his act was. When he gets to the party, almost no one there recognizes him. The few who do talk about how terrible his set was.

  • http://twitter.com/connor_hurt_4 connor hurt

    Louie gets heckled and cant think of a clever way to counter thus he just continues with his act. This eats away at louie the entire next day and while getting a slice of pizza he sees this "heckler" and confronts him. things get out of control and the heckler and a friend pound louie into the ground and with no mercy beat him up. louie lies there thinking. He retires from comedy. until a week later when a disgruntled Dane cook convinces him comedy needs him.

  • Jmau

    Louis' daughter decides she's  interested in following his career path and he decides to help her out with  writing (clean, of course) jokes, but  she gets in trouble with the principle when a joke targets  school authority
    Louie has a philosophical conversation with a bum at a bar, played by Shane Mcgowan

  • Jmau

    Ahh balls, just thought of another one
    Having fuck all else to do, Louie goes to a gay bar with his friend and learns about different orientations and even  comes to question his own sexuality. No, this isn't meant to be a slash fic, just an exploration of fluidity,etc

  • Daniel Fitzgerrell

    -Louie goes to an adult theater and upon viewing the film, realizes the film is a sex-tape that he made with his ex-wife.
    -Louie loses the ability to write new material; wandering the streets he bumps into a homeless looking Gary Shandling on the street.  All that Shandling will talk about is his re-boot of The Larry Sanders Show.  Bitter at Jeffery Tambor, Gary tries to get Louie to play the part of Hank.  The encounter leaves Louie terrified of ending up in the same position,and we see louie in the future(homeless and on the street) trying to get a little girl he sees on the street to play his daughter in a re-boot of his own tv show.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/NGXYLQRXBZYFKMHAVRIR73IYAY Josh

    - Louie has a dream where he visits his own funeral, hilarity ensues

    - Louie is at home, and while looking out the window, a black car stops in the street, and the bum that was kidnapped in an earlier episode is thrown out, hilarity ensues

    - Louie goes to the movies, and while there, someone keeps texting. He gets mad and tells them to stop, they get into an argument, and hilarity ensues

    - Louie is masturbating, hilarity does not ensue

  • Tacketts7

    Slash (of Guns N Roses fame) is a fan of Louie and asks him to do a set to open for Slash's big NYC concert. As you might expect, Louie bombs because the crowd is chomping at the bit to see Slash perform (completely uninterested in Louie's comedy stylings.) Louie introduces the band and slinks offstage. However, Slash has a hangnail and says he can't play the show. Louie is forced to go back onstage and deliver the news of the show cancellation to the already-frenzied crowd. A full scale riot breaks out akin to the Axl Rose-sparked Montreal riot of 1992. Louie gets hit in the head with a bottle and knocked unconscious, only to awaken in a hospital bed with a news report of the riot showing on the crappy hospital room TV.

  • http://twitter.com/daren_gray Daren_Gray

    – Louie kisses a black man.
    – Louie orders pizza, arrives cold.
    – Louie slips in tub, paralyzed.
    – Louie takes a bullet.
    – Louie eats mustard, is sad.
    – Louie tips teacher.
    – Louie attends matinee.
    – Louie gives up bacon.
    – Louie serves Passover.
    – Louie donates spoiled soup.
    – Louie dunks basketball.
    – Louie gets okay haircut.
    – Louie knits.

  • Mike

    Louie starts a podcast. It isn't well received.

    • http://twitter.com/megh_wright Megh Wright

      This one's my favorite.

  • Teethgrinder

    Louie gets a letter from the guy who writes that he is really fucked up because of some shit that Louie had said to him and he wants to kill himself. Louie is trying to remember all people who could be offended by him: hecklers or something. and at some point he is really obsessed with idea of saving this anonymous person. He starts watch news if somebody killed  himself. I don't know how it ends… May be it was a joke by his friend-comedian, who had told him that his joke about suicide in the Live at the beacon theatre wasn't good but he didn't listen… or not. i don't know.

  • Eric L.

    Louie finds a magic whistle.

    Louie gets hit in the head, gets amnesia and all of his friends and family try to restore his memory by reminiscing about all the crazy adventures he had in his first two seasons. None of this works, but his memory comes back when he gets hit in the head a second time.

    Louie is constipated.

  • seaweedwater

    After Louie calls Donald Rumsfeld a lizard person on a popular morning radio talk show, he finds himself on the no-fly list.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=673733443 David Burns

    -Louie's poker game gets interrupted when he is summoned to The Plaza by a horny, post-show Joan Rivers.   The door is answered by his brother Bobby, wearing a freshly greased bathrobe.  Ms. Rivers, invoking a disturbing Smothers Brothers anecdote, convinces Louis to an unspeakable threeway.  Louis thanks Joan for her mentorship, informs Bobby not to call him for nine years.

    -Louie is dragged to an improv show by a young actress he would like to plow.  Noticing how taken by the performance she is, Louis, against all his better instincts, joins the improv troupe on stage, and bombs horrendously. 

    -Louie is invited to dinner at the home of Amy Poehler and Will Arnett, where he learns they are Nazis.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=692761624 Greg Saunders

    - Louie goes to the gym and gets annoyed by the trendy classes, lazy people sitting on stationary bikes playing with their phones, and young attractive people only interested in hooking up. He decides to go to a "man's gym" and walks to the nearest boxing gym. When he arrives, it's exactly as he expected; large with a ring in the center and punching bags lining the walls, mostly-empty except for a few younger boxers and their ancient, cigarette-smoking trainers, sweaty mist fills the air, looks like not a single detail has changed since the 40's. He starts talking to the people at the gym and is disappointed that none of them live up to the stereotypes he was expecting (bubbly personalities, conversations about the Real Housewives shows, trading recipes for vegan food). 

    - A bird flies into Louie's apartment window, frightening his daughters. Louie is terrified of birds and freaks out, eventually killing the bird with a tennis racket while his girls watch in horror. They insist that they have a funeral for the bird, so they get dressed up and go to Central Park. Louie digs a hole in the ground and while eulogizing the bird, a cop wanders by and says "You can't just bury that thing here." Louie, his daughters, and the cop end up standing around for a couple of hours waiting for someone from animal control to show up. When the animal control person finally arrives, he takes the bird and tosses it in the trash.

    - Louie runs into his high school French teacher at a bookstore, who insists on greeting him in French. Louie awkwardly plays along, but uses up every single French word he knows within a couple of sentences. The teacher gets annoyed wondering why Louie didn't remember much from his four years of French. Louie argues back, the French teacher gets offended, and they end up getting into a screaming match in the middle of the bookstore. They get pulled away from each other by employees to prevent a fight and Louie yells over his shoulder "Fuck you and fuck France!"

    - Louie takes his daughters to a baseball game. A home run is hit into their area of the stands and his daughter catches the ball, just to have it snatched out of her hand by a big, scary looking guy sitting in the row behind them. Louie meekly objects, but lets it slide because he's afraid of being beaten up. After the game, Louie and his daughters eat dinner at a diner. As they're leaving, they see the big, scary guy come in. Louie has his daughters wait in the car while he walks over to the scary guy's car and pees on it. 

    - Louie is asked to deliver a toast at his cousin's wedding. He gives a boilerplate "You guys are great together…" speech and an uncle shouts "C'mon, funnyman, you can do better than that!". Louie keeps mumbling and tries to be funny before eventually telling a joke about how ugly bridesmaid's dresses are. This offends the bride so much that she wants to kick him out of the reception. He's eventually allowed to stay, but spends the rest of the reception sitting alone at his table while the rest of the crowd treats him like a piece of shit. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/iamtonyfernandez Tony Fernandez

    Our Hero earns "too much money", gets bumped into higher tax bracket, tries foie gras. Is unimpressed.

  • Michael_Kraus

    Louie dreams that he is given the opportunity to remake Pootie Tang the way he originally envisioned it, where he has complete creative control and he gets to make all the edits that he had planned to make before he was taken off the project. It is released exactly as he wanted it to be released, and it is just as much of a failure as the first time, despite all the hard work he puts in. As a result, he seems to make peace with that particular disappointment in his career, the way it went down. At the end, some young college kid on the street tells him that he is a huge fan of Pootie Tang. Louie frowns.

  • SNLabat

    - Louie is asked to voice a character in a popular animated movie, but can't find the motivation to deliver the lines. Louie then learns how vile, vicious people kids movie producers can be.

    - Louie gets drawn into the piracy debate, after he releases one of his shows for free. He finds it ridiculous until someone "pirates" one of his jokes.

    - Louie's look actually becomes trendy, and he has to go out of his way to try and not become a trend setter.

    - One of Louie's daughters befriends a black girl at school, and the parents are all to familiar with his "material".

    - Louie is asked to sit in on a panel with some famous comedians, but is discouraged when one of his idols calls him "not funny".

  • http://www.facebook.com/ecluna Emmanuel Calvin Luna

    Louie becomes sexually harassed by a woman who has false teeth, red hair, and is balding, she believes they have some common ground. 

    Louie falls in and out of love with a mentally disabled woman. Then he falls in love with her handicapable sister. 

    Louie meets Barack Obama, and then gets called a "jackass" after making horrible racial jokes that were misconstrued on Facebook. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/ecluna Emmanuel Calvin Luna

    Louie lets a human trafficker move into his house unbeknownst to him while he is on a comedy tour. 

  • Daniel O'Brien

    Louie meets a comedian called Louis CK and they hit it off and immediately start masturbating at the same time.

  • Steve Carman

    Louie makes a joke about AIDS and then isn't allowed to donate money or participate in the AIDS
    walk.

    Louie accidentally gives heroin to a recovering addict. 

    Louie uses a golf cart to get the mail. His mailbox is in the apartment building.

    Louie gets a bad haircut and nobody notices.

    Louie meets a girl that wants to film a sex tape with him. Louie ponders the offer.

    Louie gets drunk and wanders the city looking for a hot dog stand he frequented when he was a kid.

  • will dwyer

    Louie is booked to do a show at a college, the student activities booker gives Louie reason to think he may have missed out on an important part of life by never attending college. As Louie walks the campus he realizes some things are better than he expected and some are much, much worse. 

  • Aaron

    Louie loses his kids in Central Park and teams up with a plane crash survivor named Michael who's looking for his son Walt and a self proclaimed "queen" Dany who is searching for her dragons. 

  • Palmtreechaos

    Louie agrees to direct a new film without realizing that it's a snuff film. 

  • http://twitter.com/mynameisseven Richard B

    Louie time-travels back to 1993, finds himself as a writer for "Late Night with Conan O'Brien," gives a blowjob to himself and, for some reason, Tony Randall (corpse playing itself).  

  • jeremy

    -louie becomes a   recluse   in the middle of the summer after realizes he doesn't have any new material to write about. howard hughes type stuff. surrounded by  bottles  of  his  own   urine,    and he his completely nude except for a black t shirt. then august comes and he snaps out of it because he has to take his daughters to school again.

  • brycefrmbristol

    -Louie hooks up with a young attractive woman and it's not awkward at all. Louie spends rest of episode wondering why it wasn't awkward.

    -Louie discovers there's a well hung porn star who looks just like him. Reaps benefits.

    -Louie is eating a corn dog in the park when some college kids tell him he looks gay. Considering how much he loves corn dogs he figures he could handle a dude. Louie quickly finds out how wrong he was.

    -Louie appears on TV and makes a joke about cancer (in poor taste). No one gets offended. Louie feels disgusted by the world he lives in. Makes more jokes about cancer. Becomes spokesmen for fight against cancer. Compares cancer to AIDS (in poor taste). Gets booed off stage. Louie feels better about the world.

  • http://www.facebook.com/rob.lowman.92 Rob Lowman

    Louie spends the entire episode making diarrhea. He keeps leaving the bathroom to take care of things but quickly needs to return to the bathroom. He even gets a call from Pamela Adlon who has just returned from France and wants for Louie to bang her but he can't stop making Diarrhea. Finally he leaves his apartment and goes to the Comedy Cellar. He walks in and the place is wildly excited to see him. Louie then as he is about to go onstage grabs his stomach and has to leave the stage and walk to the bathroom to make more diarrhea. The episode finally ends with the cellar closing and Todd Barry coming into the bathroom to have a conversation with Louie wherein he torments Louie about his new medical condition of deathly diarrhea and for not being funny.

  • Skippy

    After a pretty great set, a fan invites Louie to her apartment and they are obviously going to have sex. She tells him that she wants to video tape it. He's hesitant at first, but eventually agrees. The video tape is later used in an attempt to blackmail Louie for a ridiculous amount of money. When Louie can't give her the money, she releases it. Frantic and in a panic, Louie rushes to consult with his manager about how to deal with this and get it off of the streets. His manager assures him that absolutely no one will want to see this tape, so he doesn't have to worry about it. Louie isn't sure how to take this.

    It's Louie's turn to provide the birthday treat at his daughter's school…even though it isn't even her birthday. He's bombarded with requests and demands for how the treat should be (vegan, gluten-free, nut-free, etc). He brings a bag of beef jerkey instead.

    Louie decides that he and the girls are going to adopt a pit bull in an effort to teach the girls about stereotypes and how wrong they can be. The dog is exactly the kind of pit bull that people are afraid of and is very stereotypically aggressive. The girls are so scared that they have had to sleep in the same bed as Louie for several nights in a row. Louie decides to take the dog back to the pound while the girls are at school one day. When he gets there, he's scolded and looked down upon for returning the dog right before they shoot the dog in the face.

    For the record, I really love pit bulls.

  • http://www.haikuambulance.com/ Hambulance

    Werner Herzog attends one of Louie's shows and asks to film a brief interview afterward for an upcoming documentary about the inevitable extinction of redheads. Louie agrees and the two of them hit it off beautifully, becoming fast friends. Soon, Louie and Werner are meeting for pizza, taking Louie's daughters for walks in the park and grabbing a nightcap on Fridays.  Louie, involuntarily and subconsciously, begins to adopt Werner's speech habits and finds himself unable to properly pronounce- let alone finish- his punchlines. Werner ultimately catches on and is wildly offended. As he sobs on Louie's couch, Louie consoles him in a full-blown Herzogian monologue.

  • Shallora

    A new take on the "Faggot" round-table scene, this time with Todd Glass at the table.

    Fantasy Sequence where Louis and Dane Cook switch bodies, with Dane taking care of kids and Louie headlining Madison Square Garden.

  • Ben C

    Louie does a guest appearance on "Curb Your Enthusiasm." He reads the script outline word-for-word and fails to improv lines. When Larry explains to him that he needs to "fill in dialogue" with improv lines, he literally says "yes, and" to Larry over and over, getting increasingly confused. Larry thinks he is making fun of the show, when he's really just bad at improv. 

  • Jana s

    Louie figures out his Netflix account has been hacked after noticing his "recently viewed movies" list includes movies he hasn't seen. He then starts adding movies to the instant queue for the other person to watch and then rates the ones the hacker adds. He puts an ad on craigslist and finally contacts the person, a woman. They go out on a date and after great sex, she turns out to be a racist. He changes his password on Netflix to end it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=692761624 Greg Saunders

    - A nerdy young fan publicly asks Louie to attend her prom. Fearing negative publicity if he says no, he agrees, chalking it up to another one of those feel-good stories about a celebrity being asked out on a date. He rents a tux and a limo, picks her up, and realizes quickly that she thinks this is a real date and is looking forward to losing her virginity. 

    - Louie gets booked for a roundtable discussion on NPR about the discussion of race in comedy. Louie makes the point that no subject is off limits, but undercuts his point when he takes fellow guest Carlos Mencia to task for continually using the word "beaner". 

    - Louie gets sent a link to a Tumblr that's nothing but photos of him doing random chores (walking to the grocery store, dropping the girls off at school, etc.) taken by a stalker. He tracks down the stalker and confronts him. They end up having a long conversation over dinner in which Louie tries to understand why the stalker didn't choose a more interesting target.

    - Louie's daughters have a sleepover in his apartment. One of the little girls steals a beer from the fridge and gets really drunk. He falls asleep and they draw flowers on his face with a sharpie and cover his clothes with stickers. The kids start throwing things off the balcony and the cops show up at his door, greeted by a crazy-looking Louie and a visibly drunk little girl.

    - An angry fan tells Louie after a show "I used to think you were hilarious before I heard you voted for Obama". They have a long, serious conversation about how one can appreciate art while having reservations about the artist. After they come to an understanding, Larry the Cable Guy walks by and they both agree he could use an ass-kicking.   

    - Louie joins the writing staff for a terrible sitcom that he knows nothing about. He sits around the writers room for a few minutes awkwardly making smalltalk with a group of people who are obviously very close to one another and practically speak their own language. The showrunner walks in and says "Next episode : Joe thinks Annie might be pregant, doesn't want to be the one to tell her, and has to keep her from drinking.". The assembled writers think it's a brilliant, groundbreaking idea for an episode and immediately start pitching ideas like mad. In an attempt to salvage an obviously hackneyed plot idea, Louie keeps throwing out ideas that are genuinely funny, but are immediately shot down. 

  • James

    Louie needs to develop a story around the video he had of himself stealing an ice cream cone and taking off on a helicopter. Brewsters millions, except instead of being charitable he tries to be as exorbitant of an a hole as possible.

  • http://twitter.com/russiansurf al o

    Louie is trapped in an elevator with people who only speak Spanish and the entire show is subtitled; I seem to remember Louie is fluent in Spanish.