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Tuesday, April 16th, 2013

The Vine 5 Film Festival: And Now, For the Weather

Vine is a toy from Twitter that challenges users to make the most profound work ever committed to video in exactly six seconds. Or at the very least, challenges comedians to bring a little more laughter into this world. Every Tuesday we showcase five of the funniest short shorts of the past week.

Your RSS feed might be difficult and not show the videos, but trust us – they are there.

"Weather, Man!!!"
By Rob Johnston

Oh God, doesn't this kind of freak you the hell out? How many times have you said you can do some talentless hack's inflated garbage job* and gotten away with it? What if you got pulled into the television and had to prove you're not full of it? It'd be like being the guy that Marshall McLuhan calls out for being a complete fraud in Annie Hall, and since you're the new Pittsburgh weatherman it would go on infinitely until you learn to be a wise, benevolent person and get Andie MacDowell to fall in love with you.

* Not you, WPXI weather forecaster Scott Harbaugh.

"Teleporting 2"
By Ridd Sorensen

Ridd Sorensen's "Teleporting" series proves that we shouldn't rush into all of the forms of technology promised to us by Walt Disney and his precious EPCOTs. Instead, we must consult our Philip K. Dick books to see how things like iTeleport are actually just Awkward Situation Manipulators.

"Whoa Worst Timing Ever"
By Jordan Burt

What the gentleman in the tie meant to say is that the politician on the news last night said that he hated Harvard people. I assume that that was how the rest of that Vine would have gone, which proves that six seconds is the perfect amount of time for comedy.

"My Cat's Inner Monologue, Every Day"
By Sara Pocock

Sara Pocock's feline friend seems to be an upstanding citizen, if we are only to consider the objective facts (goes to the bathroom in the litter box, showers daily), but if you turn your back for a second it will blast some Huey Lewis and straight up murder you.

"Portrait of a Douchebag"
By Nicholas Megalis

I'll say it: Stephan Jenkins is looking good these days.

Playing in Theater 2

How to Make French Fries by Jethro Ames

We can talk about how amazing the graphics are and the time and effort put into the video, or about how this still won't stop me from eating potato craps.

What Really Happens in Your Mouth When You Eat Pop Rocks by Brittany Furlan

I would make a reference to that urban legends movie that starred Joshua Jackson if I had seen it, but I am a terrible human being and had yet to catch it late at night on HBO Zone.

Writing. by Kurt Braunohler

Taking a trip along Diarrhea River always gets the creative juices flowing.

Rose's Dance Party by Marlo Meekins

Meekins' clumsy Rose continues to be the breakout character on Vine, but like most fast rising celebrities and the best musicians, she might get sidelined by sweet sweet candy.

This Kindly Sedan Driver is Bill Cosby by Will Sasso

Special cameo alert.