Vine 5 Film Festival: Shopping, Dancing, Heartbreak, Death, and Money for the Fair

Vine is a toy from Twitter that challenges users to make the most profound work ever committed to video in exactly six seconds. Or at the very least, challenges comedians to bring a little more laughter into this world. Every Tuesday we showcase five of the funniest short shorts of the past week.

Your RSS feed might be difficult and not show the videos, but trust us – they are there.

A couple of Oscar winners, a hater of Canadians, the subject of some of the greatest torch songs of the last few years, a deceased person, and the most ambivalent father in the Western Hemisphere star in this week’s patriotic installment of the V5FF.

“Worst Montage Ever. Complete With ‘Director’s’ ‘Direction'”
By Jim Rash
With Nat Faxon

Jim Rash and Nat Faxon recently learned that sharing the writing and directing duties for the movie The Way, Way Back is one joyous thing, but sharing a shopping cart is a whole other kind of adventure. The vine works on multiple levels, shielding itself from any criticism with the self-deprecating quotes in the title that address how you can hear the “three” coming from the person operating the camera phone, as well as insisting the cheesy montage was The Worst. Were they saying the parody was The Worst, or are they saying that a sequence of inconsequential clips of a couple to a dated song from a certain genre and quality of older films is itself The Worst, and a device they would never let anywhere near their scripts? This is why they deserve their Oscar.

“I Commissioned a Vine to Honor America”
By Steve Hely

The joke is that former American Dad, 30 Rock and The Office writer Steve Hely spent way too much time and money into making this six second video, and the added randomness of an apparent Canadian being forced to watch the choreographed efforts of about a dozen people being the icing on the 4th of July cake you insist everyone finish before they leave the party. But it’s worse than you think: there is a ten minute documentary on YouTube of the shooting of this Vine, titled 6 Seconds to Glory: The Making of Vine to Honor America. The oddly mostly serious doc revealed that it took Hely 15 takes to get the video right, and a lot of listening to Daft Punk’s new album was involved in the creative process. You can say a lot of things, but you can never say that Hely didn’t commit to the bit.

“Adele’s Ex-Boyfriend and Katherine go on a trip”
By Sunny Mabrey
With Jason Nash

Sunny Mabrey and Jason Nash teamed up for both the vine above and this one, the latter introducing a sci-fi element to Adele’s ex-boyfriend constantly getting cockblocked by his former lover. Why the Katherine character continually puts up with Adele’s haunted ex-boyfriend remains unclear, and the question probably cannot be answered in a mere six seconds.

“Dead People Be Like…”
By Chris D’Elia

Usually, when the ongoing habit that some viners have of wasting time introducing the premise of the video, even though the premise is in the title is perpetuated, the vine is weaker for it – not in this case. The jarring difference in the timing of “Dead People Be Like…” – a half of one second of set-up followed by five and a half seconds of a man completely still – compared to most of the other vines in the universe, is the secret behind its hilariousness.

“#Howto Wake Your Kids With Mixed Signals”
By JoshDarnit

JoshDarnit also came off as a bit aggressive towards his son for his birthday, but he means well. I don’t know how his son will take starring in Vine videos when he’s a teenager, or when he’s an adult that worries about car insurance. What will “starring in Vine videos” even mean? Vine could and probably will be the next radio, or “fairs.”

Playing in Theater 2

My Daughter Doing Her Tig Notaro Impression by Nate Bargatze

Wow it’s uncanny.

I Orgasm Weird by Kurt Braunohler

He says weird. I say regal.

Remembering to Feed Dad by Jacy Catlin

It’s been a rough couple of Father’s Days for Mr. Catlin

I’m Having a Great Time by H. Alan Scott

I don’t believe him.

The Iron Granny Shot by K.C. James

Both impressive *and* dumb.

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