Everybody fancies themselves as some sort of wizard that can conjure up laughter by a few strokes of a keyboard, but only a few tweeters are truly worthy enough to have all of their witticisms transmitted to you, the ever busy comedy fan trying to navigate through an increasingly congested internet. Every Friday we'll make your life a little bit easier by introducing you to an individual that you might not know about who consistently makes us laugh and momentarily forget that other days of the week exist.
(If you're reading this from an RSS feed, jump on over to the website where you can actually view the tweets for an optimal level of enjoyment.)
Megan Beth Koester (@bornferal), is a writer and stand-up comedian who took the time to talk about the possibly true stories behind some of her funniest tweets.
"When I turn my TV on, I want to see The Patty Duke Show. Or The People's Court. Anything else incenses me. Especially when it involves lionizing the inbred future leader of a rapidly crumbling empire."
"I once put my college diploma in a frame I bought at the dollar store. As soon as I hung it, it fell off the wall and broke. I threw the broken frame and worthless piece of paper into the closet, where it has suffered in purgatory for over two years. I have suffered, also in purgatory, directly outside said closet."
"I'm constantly toeing the line of financial desperation, which is probably why I have so much character. I recently submitted a writing packet to a late night show; in the CV attached I wrote, 'My career objective is to make enough money to afford to live in an apartment that has more than one room in it. I believe writing for basic cable can help me achieve this humble goal.'"
"The only thing people love more than talking about themselves is writing about themselves. She typed."
"Al Gore invented the internet as a holding facility for the world's indignation. Every day, someone shits a new blog out into the zeitgeist I'm told I should be violently incensed about. It's exhausting, being this upset. But seriously…have you HEARD about this whole rape joke thing?!?"
Nope haven't heard a thing. Anyway, it isn't just the new blogs/websites that get Megan's attention.
Reading bumper stickers provokes reactions as well.
Megan is more interested in being the one that is read.
Because some books just aren't very exciting.
It still beats television.
Especially if you aren't even looking at the screen.
But TV is where the real money is.
Fortunately for Koester, she's inherited a fortune.
Megan knows what love is.
And who she is.
But it doesn't help her self-esteem.
Koester knows how to get happy.
But crippling indecision always gets in the way of her bliss.
Megan isn't as confused as some of her fellow stand-ups though.
Megan likes to take chances.
She has flashbacks of physical and psychological torture.
But don't worry, Megan will be fine. She has a backup plan.