Vine 5 Film Festival: Selling Out In a Buyer’s Market

Vine is a toy from Twitter that challenges users to make the most profound work ever committed to video in exactly six seconds. Or at the very least, challenges comedians to bring a little more laughter into this world. Every Tuesday we showcase five of the funniest short shorts of the past week.

Your RSS feed might be difficult and not show the videos, but trust us – they are there.

This past week on Vine found an aspiring sellout selling out, a glimpse into our spoiled future, dueling bed riffs, a horrific camping injury, and a new way to recap old TV shows.

“Doritos ©⭕m3®$@1 #pl3asdonthurtmyfamleydoritos #ibegu #promoted #richeatdoritozplease”
By Conner O’Malley

In a disheartening and completely expected turn of events, Conner O’Malley sold out to Taco Bell, as well as, thanks to an unholy alliance, the fine folks at Doritos. The funny twist of it all is that apparently O’Malley is selling the product not out of a continued affection for all things commerce, but because we are all in grave danger if the company don’t sell enough delicious Loco Tacos. Even though the hocking of a product is natural progression for the character of the UCB performer, he’s apparently moved on to cheering for Forrest Gump characters.

“Snobby Guys From the Future”
By Jason Nash
With Cody Johns and Curtis Lepore

In our Taco Bell/Doritos ruled future, it sounds like traffic is only going to get worse. At the very least, humans are going to continue to look and sound ungrateful about the technology they take for granted. While a possible influence to this vine may have been all of those The Californians sketches on SNL, Nash and company make it their own, with the nice added touch of Lepore seemingly floating by as he chimes in with his protest.

“Getting Philosophical With Furniture”
By Jess Matsumoto

Matsumoto claimed by way of hashtag that she was going to delete this vine, but fortunately she never followed through on that threat. What’s strange is that two days earlier, Matt Braunger made his own vine involving a mattress with a message graffitied on it, but the message was entirely different.

Banksy is getting lazy.

“Camping Is Hard For Me”
By Steven Wilber

Wilber’s vines always seem to have a little bit of a cartoonish quality to them, and the unintelligible writing in “Camping Is Hard For Me” continues that trend. A more visually exciting video from Wilber’s account found Steven destroying an entire house to prank his friends, which is the kind of behavior you would expect from Chris Elliott in Get a Life, a show famous for horrifying Fox executives for essentially being a live action cartoon.

“Found This Weird Box and Plugged It In. I Think It’s Describing ‘Sex and the City’ Episodes?”
By Avery Monsen

The UCB Theater actor has used visual trickery in the past with his work on Vine, but never for use with such an odd concept as this one. It’s interesting enough to note that the box resembles what some people might remember as how their televisions looked and operated during the pre-HBOGO and Netflix late 1990s when SATC was on the air. Also this past week, the master from The Master repeatedly popped out of Monsen’s oven.

Playing in Theater 2

Scone Tat? Tone Scat? Cone Stat!? by Myq Kaplan

So far all of Myq’s vines have featured his delightful singing voice.

Childhood Games Made Real, Pt. 3 by Tony Oswald

The lyrics to “Don’t Worry Baby” were about a Monopoly game.

How to Ruin a Nice Father/Son Basketball Game by Brittany Furlan

That’s traveling.

Parental Advice by Robert Kelly

Kelly needed your help and you undoubtedly failed him.

(Untitled) by Mae Whitman

Oh no what if Mitch Hurwitz makes season five of Arrested Development all vines?

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