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Posts tagged as children

NASA's Response to a Child Prodigy, by Ian Abramson

Dear Sammy,

Let me be the first to say how impressed we here at NASA were to receive such an ambitious spaceship design from a six-year-old. The details in your blueprints would have been impressive for a 12-year-old prodigy, let alone a six-year-old prodigy.

While we were deeply impressed with your innovative use of solar panels, we did have a few notes that we thought would strengthen your overall design. Please understand we aren't just writing to criticize. In fact, take this as a sure sign that we want to put your rocket in space as quickly as we can. We expect to get it in [...]

Our Son, The Asshole, by Noell Wolfgram Evans

My wife’s hand found its way to mine; in the corner of the overly lit room our five-year old son was blissfully unaware of cruel trick the fates had played upon him. We were in shock. Tears welled in my eyes as I looked at him enjoying perhaps his last happy moments, ripping the head off of one of the dolls in the bucket of toys that so many doctor’s offices place in the corner of their exam rooms as a way to offer “comprehensive” medical care.

I looked back at the doctor. I could see that her lips were moving but I could hardly discern the words that [...]

I Know How To Make Your Movie Better, by Django Gold

It needs to have a cute, little kid who is always outsmarting the grown-ups. There. That's it. That's what's going to make your movie stand above the rest: a little kid — a cute, little kid — and he has to be clever and cute, and, most importantly, he must outsmart the grown-ups. That's what the audience wants, and that's what you will give them.

Here's why this is going to work. Let's say you've got this other guy in your movie, this uptight accountant-type. A real square peg who's always bringing the mood down with his lectures and polo shirt. He thinks he's going to spend all of [...]