As you well know, this coming Saturday marks that most cherished of high school traditions, the senior prom, during which you, our soon-to-be-graduated Glendale Badgers, will gather at the fabulous DeVille Hotel for an evening of dancing and wonderment you'll not soon forget. The prom is a special moment in one's life, and so, in hopes of presiding over the glitz and glamour that mark this most magical of nights, I hereby submit my candidacy for prom king.
Just as in past years, my credentials for this lofty office speak for themselves. Moreover, unlike the pimply amateurs who have repeatedly besmirched [...]
This week's episode begins with the disappointment that Tim and Tom were unable to attend this year's Wrestlemania and the full intention of doing the episode about a different subject entirely before the power of Wrestlemania flat-out demands that they instead indeed talk almost exclusively about wrestling. Of course this means talking about the recent Hulk Hogan Uncensored at the Beacon Theatre that neither attended, a nearly screenplay accurate recounting of the Wrestling Buddies commercial and Tim's close encounter with a Murphy bed.
Also discussed in depth this week: Tom's legacy as a two-term class president in high school and his attempts at recreating a wrestling fundraiser he and Tim both attended [...]
Most pot dealers tend to be relatively mellow dudes, or so I've heard. Not so in the new trailer for upcoming high school stoner comedy High School, in which Adrien Brody plays a pot dealer who looks like he also dabbles in PCP. Also on board are Colin Hanks as a teacher and a truly insane-looking Michael Chiklis as the villainous principal. The premise — that a school-wide drug test forces some enterprising young stoners to get the entire school high so everybody fails — is a fun one, but it also looks to be aimed squarely at the high school demographic. We'll see! It hits theaters on June [...]
1. You remember that you did. Memory serves as a bank of perceptual information. Neural stimuli built up throughout years of schooling can provide sufficient evidence that you attended school in the 1990s. This confirmation method can be disregarded in cases of prolonged hypnosis, brainwashing, drug abuse, head trauma, electroconvulsive therapy, neuropsychiatric disease, and/or if you have ever entered an extended fugue state.
2. You are told explicitly by a trusted person. Trusted people could include your parents, siblings, mentors, the President, or a longtime friend. Asking the person to repeat him or herself, or to put the statement in writing reduces the possibility of an auditory hallucination. You [...]
On this episode: Tammy's Tavern but a suds & foam machine, an immortal must face his financial instability, two dudes accidentally have phone sex, the Big and Tall Mall on DePaul, "My Turn" with Rich Ditchbauer, Bane takes a stab at VO work, an art museum docent goes for the hard sell on the Degas, Dateline's Steve Morris can't believe the Blue Bluffs Killer is for real, a doctor can't bring himself to give bad news to an already bald man, Socrates overdoes it, and the principal forgets a very important announcement.
Though technically every comedy is a stoner comedy if Snoop's on the cast, we are excited to hear about Snoop Dogg and Wiz Khalfa's new comedy High School. It was the role he was born to play (in addition to his role in Half Baked)! “Me and Snoop are working on a movie, High School,” Khalifa revealed while at SXSW. “It should be coming out pretty soon. We’ve got the soundtrack going with it, too, which is a really big deal. It’s basically like me and Snoop’s album; it’s me and him going back and forth on songs the whole time, so it’s a big deal.”
Alex Semmelmeyer is my future husband but since he’s the punter of the football team he’s too busy to know I exist! But that’s OK because here’s what I did today to make him realize I was born and one day he’s going to raise four babies with me:
• I stood outside his Bio class and when he walked out I talked really loudly about Peyton Manning so he would be interested and look in my direction.
• I stuffed notes in his locker that were anonymous but were in my really distinct poetic voice.
• I stood outside his Gov class and talked really loudly about Archie [...]
Awwww! You guys, awwww. This code breaking, tap dancing hockey player seemed like one hell of a guy in high school. As Kenzie says in the video below, President Obama should really take swagga lessons from him. Though, as Bobby "Don't call me Bobby Moynihan, just call me Bobby; call me by my human first name, please" Moynihan says in the video below he probably shouldn't even been allowed in the school. Either way, he's great at drinking water.
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