The Bodyguard: Punjab Resigns as Head of Warbucks Security Detail, by Patricia Grant

On Behalf of Airway Airlines, Thank You For Choosing Us and Knowingly Riding This Plane Full of Supernatural Creatures, by Ben Hargrave

The 10 Best Sneezes of 2016, by Jonathan Zeller

Last-Minute Gift Ideas Sure to Streamline Your Rise to Power, by Cody Ziler

Electrical Appliances I Would Make Sweet Love To, If Required, by Sarah Hutto

I Am the Official Boatman of the Hudson River, by Luke Strickler

The Dominatrix Dungeon Intern Gets Disciplined, by Bizzy Coy

Inventions I Plan on Pitching to Powerful Venture Capitalists, by Jeremy Glass

Inside the Rise of ‘Reductress’

The Harem Guards Will Rock You, Eventually, Maybe, by Jerry Renek