Splitsider

Posts tagged as jeremy blachman

The Humor Section

Pardon the Construction: Our Plastic Surgery Clinic Is Undergoing a Face Lift, by Jeremy Blachman

by | March 25th, 2013

Attention Patients:

Please accept our apologies for the condition of our waiting room and interior offices. Although we pride ourselves on our appearance, you may have noticed that our wallpaper is beginning to buckle, our bookshelves are starting to sag, and our upholstery has suffered a bit of discoloration. Just a little, but small problems can lead to bigger ones. Which is why we must apologize for the inconvenience as our plastic surgery clinic undergoes a face lift.

We'll be pulling the rug as tight as we can, and turning the walls a completely different color than they currently are. We'll also be injecting some material from the couch [...]

The Humor Section

What Happens In Ittoqqortoormiit Stays In Ittoqqortoormiit, by Jeremy Blachman

by | February 6th, 2012

Ever want to kill a walrus with your bare hands and have no one back at home begging for a share of the meat? Perhaps you want to bathe in a natural hot spring, alone with an arctic fox, naked, and never have to explain yourself. Or maybe you just want to get away from it all, and drown your sorrows at our local pub, located next to the hospital, open from 10pm to 3am on most Fridays, and sometimes even serving beer, if a ship passes by, and drops some off.

Well, you can.

Because what happens in Ittoqqortoormiit stays in Ittoqqortoormiit.

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