Posts tagged as liz arcury

The Songs of Bruce Springsteen, by Liz Arcury

The following are excerpts of reviews of some selected songs of Mr. Bruce Springsteen and The E Street Band.

“4th of July, Asbury Park (Sandy),” The Wild, the Innocent & the E Street Shuffle (1973) With this album, Mr. Springsteen is exploring a newer, slower – yet explosive – sonic sexuality that America did not know was coming. After collaborating with various music historians who were active at the time of the album’s release, we have concluded that the second track, “4th of July, Asbury Park (Sandy),” might be based on the non-fictional, existent location on the northern shore of New Jersey known as Asbury Park.

“Badlands," Darkness on [...]

I Am Sam Was Sad. We Get It, by Liz Arcury

My name is Roxanne McLachlan and I lost my homecoming queen crown to Dakota Fanning.

We go to Campbell Hall Episcopal High School here in North Hollywood, CA. Well, I go here. Little Miss Fanning maybe shows up six days out of the school year when she feels like it or when she’s not being flown around the world and being in movies. We barely ever see her walking down the halls and when we do it’s always a big fucking production. I usually go home sick those days.

When voting came around in September all my friends said they would vote for me. Everyone said they would vote [...]

Nancy Drew and the Case of the Cooperstown Slut, by Liz Arcury

“Fifteen dollars? Come on, Nance, there are dozens of other stores in the mall that sell candles. Don’t settle on this one just yet,” Bess Marvin assured Nancy Drew, as they, along with George Fayne, Bess’s cousin, strolled through the River Heights Mall. The three teenage friends were out for a shopping day to relieve some stress. Their academic and work lives were fine, but Nancy insisted that they take a day to decompress after a run-in with that outright whore from Cooperstown at Ned Nickerson’s party last Friday night.

The girl, Carmen, was around their age and also a total slut. Nancy had learned from past cases to [...]

If the Zhou Dynasty Is to Continue, We Musn't Fall Into a "Hilariously Wallow in Our Awkwardness" Cultural Implosion, by Liz Arcury

A pleading letter from a palace servant, Liu, to King Huan, his ruler and king of the Zhou Dynasty, 700 B.C.

My Lord,

I know that I am simply a humble palace servant. There are thousands of us. But I feel I must break hierarchical standards and sneak you this letter. I am writing to warn you of our kingdom’s impending cultural doom. Please do not disregard this.

I have started to notice something odd in the town square. This morning, for example, I spotted a young man and a young woman walking toward each other in front of the fish market. As they were about to pass each [...]