So much for the two-headed Colbert-Cain super-candidate hydra. Despite a crowd at their joint rally that qualified as the biggest crowd yet of the 2012 campaign, only 6,324 out of about 600,000 voters threw their support behind Cain in the South Carolina Primary — and it's uncertain how many of those people meant to symbolically support Colbert and how many just like pizza and creepy, slow-burning smiles. Does this mean Colbert's exploratory committee has met its end? Will he seize back the power of his Super PAC from Jon Stewart's cold, cash-filled hands? Or will he somehow interpret the minuscule number of voters as a sign [...]
Herman Cain will tape a segment with Stephen Colbert in South Carolina on Friday, having enjoyed Colbert's Super PAC's recent endorsement. Even though Cain's out of the race, his name is still on the ballot in South Carolina, and Colbert has said that “Anybody who shares my values can show it by voting for Herman Cain.” To sum up: Cain is not running but is on the ballot, Colbert wants to run but isn't eligible to be on the ballot, Colbert pretended to be Cain in an ad, voting for Cain means you're really voting for Colbert, and Cain's going to be on Colbert's show. What is [...]
The Seriously, We 100% Absolutely Aren't Coordinating With Stephen, We Promise Super PAC has a new ad, and it brings back all kinds of poignant memories from those halcyon days when Herman Cain was still in the race. Most notably, his terrifying ad-closing smile. It looked like he wanted to make a pizza and sprinkle us on top as the delicious topping. And then eat us.
Here's the accompanying press release:
Oh, it is so ON. After the news broke that he beat Jon Huntsman in a hypothetical South Carolina poll, Stephen Colbert is promising a "major announcement" on his show tonight. Now, I'm not saying he's going to run for president because I told him to, but isn't he? You're welcome, America. And yes, Stephen, I would consider a job as your campaign manager.